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Tuesday, March 18, 2008 Y 7:12 PM LIFE'S A BITCH indeed it is. im sorry for not blogging lately, and not updating.. im really busy. (: im busy studying and brushing up my schoolwork. every since i met mrs wong outside school and she told me that i dropped alot.. well, im bucking up ! and this is going to be a long long post, because im not going to blog again.. for a few days. ): im sorry dearest readers, but studying comes first ! no wait, family comes first, studying second... blogging, maybe the 20th ? heh heh. around there la. (: anyways. about today. i had choir today. and we ( wantien & melissa & me & moyra & renee & prisca ) were so fcuking bored and tired that we went out for a ' toilet break ' and ended up outside school, at the econs (: and then we slacked.. then the guys were outside the music room, and they spotted us, and we casually walked back to school, up the stairs and into the music room. i was laughing with clenched teeth and giving a im-oh-so-serious face. haha. :D oh i realised i love high jump ! and im really good at it. [ as said by cas (: ]. ohyay, my new love, high jump. but its just that how the hell am i going to do high jump at home ? and we do in during pe like, once or twice a year ? how pathetic is that la ? -_- anyways. then when we ( me & moyra & wantien ) boarded bus 5 home, wantien saw her * and that he boarded the same bus too. muahahha. and i saw * too ! :D and im standing * of him. ( giggles ! ) oh oh oh, and brandan was like ' such a loser ! ' at me. im so gonna adopt 50 millions cat at SPCA and dump them in his room. i'll see how he likes that ! ( * sticks out tongue ! ) and we're gonna get back our report card tml. im not going to be surprised if i cry or get scolded, or get laughed at, or whatever, because i deserve it alright. (: i accept the fact that i slacked for term one, and i should be severely punished for failing so many subjects. (: i need many many tuitions ! MARK ! YOU'D BETTER FIT ME INTO YOUR SCHEDULE ! OR ELSE I'LL NEVER GO OUT WITH YOU EVER AGAIN ! okay, for a few days back.. lets recap. (: my sister is in japan now, she went off yesterday night. muahahah. and her boyfriends not going to disturb me anymore !! hahaha ! because he's such an asshole ! ( see, i told you i'll put that on my blog :P ) he always likes to argue with me, debate with me, saying im flat and short. you see, he isnt as tall either. im going to grow taller than you ! you just wait ! but i ( * hehehe) his suzuki swift. muahahah. we went to ikea one night for supper, and when he drove back, he opened all the windows and he drove at 140km/h. really. it was like so fast, and the wind was so strong, i took off my specs and put my face beside the window... and my hair was like, slapping my face, and when i got home, my whole face was red, literally. the best experience ! so much better then a rollercoaster ! :D i have this fcuking problem with myself. im such a bitch ! [ and yes, youre thinking, ' now then you know ah ? loser ! ' ] and i'll say, whatever, only i can think myself as a bitch. so fcuk off if you think im a bitch (: plus ! if you hate me, you really shouldnt be reading my blog, let alone remember me ! if i hate someone, i'll forget anything and everything about this person, like he/she never existed. (: anyways, back to the topic. i really hate myself, especially at this point of time. for some reasons i dont want to expose to the whole wide world, or esle my life would be ruined, like Emma from ' can you keep a secret ?'. excatly like Emma. D: well, all i want to say now is, i really hate myself, and i really feel like jumping to my death, because im so fickle-minded ! just fcuk my fickle-mindedness ! please, i dont want to be fickle-minded ! i really cant afford it, its bringing me so much pain and confusion. first i'll be like.. I WANT THAT.. then i'll be like.. NO. I WANT THAT !.. then i'll be like I WANT ALL ! ... i hate this. please god, get it away from me ! i want to restart my life, if i can, and not let myself repeat the same silly mistakes, get myself into stupid, embarassing situations, and get myself into unforgivable troubles/problems. but i know that'll never happen, because that's what life is, you get afraid, embarassed, angry, sad and you get into the worst problem you could ever imagine. you love life crumbles.. your social life crumbles.. you financial difficulties gets worse.. you family leaves you.. and stuff like that. i guess for me, its more of peer pressure.. puppy love...schoolwork and family bonds. i guess thats what actually troubles me. but please, i need some time to breathe, to think, to straighten my thoughts, plan which paths i choose to take, study, and most importantly, TO STONE (: okay, i need to go now (: bye ! p.s. - i will not be blogging for the next few days. DO MISS ME ! ;D
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Superstar 
i was on the verge of laughing SEAHYANGWENN! AWESOME BASSIST WANNABE ! Im Ethan Mentzer's & Joe Guese's wife, got a problem with that ? I LOVE THE CLICK FIVE ♥ Click here if you want to leave.
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